A friend of mine works part-time cleaning sewers - he works every Monday and Tuesday. I recently asked him how the job was going. 'You know,' he said, 'different shit, same day'.
I've not got brain damage; I had an extreme form of Christianity inculcated in me as a young boy.
What did the humorous chicken say? You know you love my yolks!
What did the Swedish chicken say? Another yolk? You must be yolking!
I've a friend who's obsessed with collecting fake breasts. His flatmate is very messy. I find, to get back at her, he gives tit for tat.
Recently, I bought a suit. Quite coincidentally, I knew my two friends' suit sizes. 'Shall I buy you each a suit?' I asked them. 'No thanks,' they each replied. 'Suit yourselves, then,' I said.
